Modern love can be challenging

For many people the world of dating can be very tricky to navigate. Wanting to find and meet a compatible romantic partner is a central feature in many of our lives. Knowing what “the rules” are and where you stand with potential partners can be an emotional minefield. Past experiences might affect the way you relate to others now, and nearly everyone has experienced some form of heartbreak, whether its ghosting, cheating or having unrequited love with someone who saw you as a friend.

For many people the use of dating apps has opened up their options in very positive ways. However, for many people, it can make the prospect of meeting a partner more difficult to unravel. Having what can seem like unlimited choice has caused dating to become more complex. We are often flooded with images of “perfect love” that can make an authentic and sustainable connection with another person feel unobtainable. The internet has left us with the impression that if someone doesn’t meet our needs we can and should find an alternative. When there isn’t a perfect spark with someone immediately, we may become disillusioned and look for someone else. In addition, it was not that long ago that finding a partner to have casual sex with was quite an involved task. Now that we have access to so many people, there has been an increase in perceived “hookup culture”, and while this has been immensely sexually liberating for some people, for others it can cause a lot of miscommunication and confusion. 

It can also become increasingly pressured to couple up with someone once you get into your thirties. You may have fewer single friends and as you settle into the routines of adult life your single status may hit a little closer to home.

Whatever your individual dating story is, working through your personal history with romantic relationships can help you focus on what is happening now and look to where you want to go next.